More prayers for my daughter

[Greg Schmelzer]

Well, as most of you know, my daughter Kerstin has some issues with drug abuse. Just a small reminder, I had to put her in jail last year right before Christmas to get her the rehab help she needed. Here is a link to the original thread.

http://v8buick.com/showthread.php?t=32748&highlight=Prayers+daughter

She was doing great until last week when she relapsed and smoked alot of weed. She is still not able to say no when this stuff shows up.

Please pray for her to recover and kick this evil. Pray for me too as it is killing me. Now we don't know if she will be released before Christmas again this year.

Now, how about a little advice for me. From all of this, I lost a well paying job and have been out of work since February. I have been limiting my job search to the local area in hopes of being here when she gets released. Now we have no idea when her releases date is to be and I still have not found a job locally. I have turned down a job or two that were not in the area for this specific reason and they were both in the $55 - $60K year range. What I would like opinions on is this. Should I expand my job search or keep it local. I have been bending over backwards trying to do what I can to help her and be here for her when she needed me, but the first opportunity she gets, she is back on the weed. I told her last therapy session that that is what I was gonna do. When she decided that she wants to have me in her life more than the drugs, then I would come to get her. Is this the right approach, or should I keep putting my life on hold for her? I have gone completely through my savings and it is taking all I have to keep the house right now.

Any and all opinions will be taken into account and I will let you know what I finally decide. Thanks for letting me get this off my chest. Sorry for the long post.

[65WILDKAT]

Greg,
I am a father of three 1 Man and 2 Women they are 22 19 and 16 in order.
I remember when I had troubles with my Son and I did the same thing that you are trying to do. Well after many long prayers with God He showed Us the light, Remember this You were here before her and you gave her Life and I am sure that you did your best to show her what was right and what was wong in life. You can not stop your life nor can you live her life for her!
I know the power of Drugs I have been in recovery for 28 years now and I can tell you this, As long as you keep being there for her and not letting her hit "BOTTOM" she will not conform to your wishes. You need to get on with your life and be there for her with in reason. Drugs make people do things to others that make no sense at all. I had to let my son hit "Bottom" and I stood on the other side of the closed door to my house crying my heart out for him. But today he is a Student in College and before that he was Saragent in the Marines Fighting in Iraq and Afghanistan, All this occured only four years ago. Please don't ruin your life for someone who does not care for you enough to see that you have given all that you can and more!
You are going to have make rules that she and you will live by and if the rules are broken then the door swings both ways! I Know how hard it is but like I said before you were here first living a life that was good and true and you can not let her rule and ruin your life nor the ones that you love.
Best to tell her MY WAY OR THE HIGHWAY! until she can be trusted again. It will hurt and you will cry many a tear but if she truely loves you she will come around!
God Bless you,
Don

[12lives]

You have to take care of yourself before you can take care of her. Losing the house and being in debt is not the answer. I wish I had the answer for her, but I don't. I guess it has to do with self doubts, boredom, sickness, etc. My prayers are with you and her. Best of luck!

- Bill

[Mentalkase]

Stick to your guns brother.

I have known many men where you are at,and they all say that is the only thing you can do.Live your life,and when she hits the bottom of the pit,you will be who she calls.

[70 gsconvt]

Good luck to you. My 3 year old just got out of the hospital because of pneumonia. It was only for a day, but what an ordeal. I'll say a prayer for you.

[silvergs72]

Lay her at God's feet!!

A lot of times we step in and stop the plans that God has in place. It is a hard thing to do but the bible say that we are to lay our problems at His feet. I have a step daughter that we had to put in juvi and leave her to her own resourses for a long time until she realised what she was doing.
My prayers will be thinking of you and yours.

Go on with your life and God will do what He has to to bring her to a place where He can work in her life.

Mike

[Buick_350X]

I have known way to many people with drug problems. And jail time never solves the problem. Its the friends they have and the environment that must change. Id go ahead and find a job far far away from where you are living now. Make a major move.

Maybe even consider an all girls private, religious or military school.
environment is the key.

[DugsSin]

Being a parent of teenagers my heart bleeds for you. But as a parent you MUST let her make the decision which life to lead and which path will include YOU.
Make no mistake she/the drug habit will take you for every penny you have made or will ever make. Shes already got you on the downhill slide and when YOU hit bottom then you have to decide who you want to save.