Ok, I hate little dogs. I always have and I always will. My dads girlfriend, who has moved in, along with lots of ugly furniture and stupid useless junk, has one of these little rodents. The dogs name is Minnie, go figure . I came home from getting some stuff at the grocery store to find a little turd the size of a green bean on the kitchen floor.:af: :af: I have 3 large dogs, one white german shepard, one akita mix and a dalmation mix. All of them are 65lbs or larger, so I know who made this. So I walk up to my dads room where this little beast of burden hides out, and go to look for it. I spot her sitting on a chair up there. I go and pick the little **** box up and start carrying it down the stairs to the kitchen. I show her the turd she oviously made and then tossed her shaggy ass outside. I then put away the groceries and started reading the Hot Rod Magazine that I had picked up at the store. My dads girlfriend comes home and asked me why the hell her dog was outside in the cold. I explained that the little scamp had taken a dump on the kitchen floor and I had to clean it up. She then tells me that there was no way "her minnie moochie" would ever pich a loaf of the floor. I had already taken the trash out to the dumpster by this point and there was no way I was going to go dumpster diving for a peice of dog **** so I just decieded to let it go. Then my dad sticks his nose into the picture, telling me not to be mean to her dog and this, that and the other thing. :af: :af: I swear Ive had enough of this crap (no pun intended). I think Its time to start looking for an apartment. ________ Ocean View Condominium
Here minnie moochie , here baby come to momma , what did he do to you ? Are your lil feetsies cold ? oh you poor baby . Come ,lets cuddle and let mommy keep you warm.Those big ole dog's blaming thier biscuits on you ? Bad doggies !!ou: :TU:
That waas so funny, it made me cry. I have 3 pugs, so I know what you're talking about. Pinched a loaf. hee hee. :grin:
happy meal Jake , if you don't feed your large dogs for a day or two, maybe they'll make a happy meal out that little s**thead dog!!! Problem gone! Randy:Brow:
Ya know, I love dogs in general... but like my wife says whenever we come across a "small" breed: "...NOT a REAL dog..." I'll admit they are a step or 2 above a cat, but most small breed dogs just annoy me. A real dog has to be big enough to wrestle with, without worrying about squashing him! :TU:
Thats almost EXACTLY what she said. Oh god, venting a little frustration made this sooooo much more fun. ________ MatureDomme
Yeah I love my 3 other dogs. They all love to wrestle. This little vandal pisses on the floor whenever she sees me. I have never done anything mean or unfair to this little bastard. I just get a little pissed when anyhting, be it cat, dog, goldfish or cockroach defacates or pisses on my floor. And the straw the that just broke the camels back for me was when I asked why it would be unfair for her to be punished exactly the way that the other dogs would have been if they had done this. My dads girlfriends answer was "because shes little" WTF?!:af: The cats out in the barn are little, why can they be outside. Oh thats different. WTF ever. This is absurd.:af: ________ Wispr Portable Vaporizer
If you have to bend over to pet it, it's not a dog. You have my sympathy. Just pray your dad figures out what you already know. If you let them move in, eventually they'll cr@p all over ya.
man! girl trouble, doggie trouble, this isnt your week, is it? you did say it was microwave sizedo No:[the dog], didn't you?
maybe it wasnt minnie .... maybe dad did it and didnt realize it. he could have been dancin round th house like tom cruise in risky business when nobody else was home, then he hears a car pull in th drive, and as he takes off runnin for cover, drops one on th floor.:grin: was bob seger's "old time rock and roll" playin on th radio when you walked in?
Easy way to solve the problem. Put the big dogs in the yard, don't feed them for a few days. Slather "her minnie moochie" with A1 Steak Sauce. Place "her minnie moochie" in the yard with large hungry dogs. No more carpet sausages......:TU:
This little bastard could get eaten by the barn cats if they were hungry enough. Yeah, Im over the girl trouble thing already, but this little mongrel has me seeing red. If i was a cruel person, the bath tub would get filled up and she would mysteriously get dropped in. But Im not, so I wont. Hmmm, what to do what to........? ________ Web shows
Oh my God , That was one of the funniest damn stories I've ever heard!! And I work in a county run hospital!!!!!Good one Jake !! You should try and sell that one!!!:laugh:I think I just pissed myself !!
Whoa!!!! Hold on a second!! Gotta put in my 2 cents!! :Smarty: Yes, little dogs are NOT DOGS! They are what we women call "our little babies"! Yes, they are good for nothing but love and companionship and occassional S _ _ _ for mommy to clean up off the floor if WE screw up and not let them out. Now don't tell us you've never made "a little mistake" once in your life. :laugh: So sorry for your "doggie" problems. I'd rather clean up a little dump from a little doggie than a huge monstrosity of a dump that big dogs can do!! I sure hope you meant for that story to be funny because I found it hilarious!!!!!:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: Dee
All three of my dogs will bark and scratch at the door for hours when they have to go, begging someone to let them out. "Minnie the moochie poochie" does not. She pisses and ****s all over the house with out even a hint of remourse.:stmad: Yeah, I have made mistakes but I havent taken a crap anywhere but where it belonged in 16 years (Im 18). This little bastard isnt a puppy either, shes 5. How old is that in dog years? 35 or so? This is by far not the first time the little scamp has done a "**** and run" either. Ive found her little string beans in the basement, MY bathroom (that noone else uses but me), in the hallway, everywhere. Although I have yet to see one where they belong OUTSIDE!!!:af: :af: BTW, I am intentionally using funny phrases to describe these occurances. If I didnt make it funny I would just get mad and use even worse language than I already have. Oh well, the "s-word"isnt that bad. ________ NEXIUM SETTLEMENT UPDATE
That IS funny. The next thing dads girlfriend would be saying is "Why is Minnies tail hanging out ouf your Akitas mouth?"
actually you cant really blame the dog, you have to go to the teacher. she apparently doesnt have her s#!t together if she cant teach her own baby better. just a thought.
I couldnt agree more. Mine are trained. They dont make messes. I think it shows alot about the owner, although i dont like the dog either. She yaps all damn night at cars driving down the road. Its just getting old. ________ a00TonyRomero
