Did you hear about all the people being found dead, drowned in bathtubs fulla Cornflakes and milk? Police suspect a cereal killer!:laugh:
ar ar ar... humor Last time I heard that one I nearly fell off my dinosour....Good one Dan. hows this..... a leper walks into a bar and each time he takes a drink the bartender pukes... after a few drinks the leper ask's why.... the bartender says "I have no problem with you, but the guy behind you keeps dippin his chips in your back"......... I apologize to anyone(lepers included) who may be offended by this joke. Dana
Okay, heres another of my favorites, Did you hear about the two semi-trucks that were highjacked in Chicago this week? One was full of rolidexes, the other was full of filing cabinets................................................ Police suspect organized crime:laugh:
funny stuff The local newspaper reported today that some individual has stolen all the toilet seats from the precinct. The lead detective said they have nothing to go on.ou:
Did you hear on the news about the guy who fell into the big sewing machine at the upholstery shop? He had a rough time of it, but he's fully recovered now.
How about the butcher who backup up into the meat grinder? He got a little behind in his work! :shock: Mark
A distraught senior citizen phoned her doctor's office. "Is it true," she wanted to know, "that the medication you prescribed has to be taken for the rest of my life?" "Yes, I'm afraid so," the doctor told her. There was a moment of silence before the senior lady replied, "I'm wondering, then, just how serious is my condition. This prescription is marked 'NO REFILLS'."
A horse walks into a bar and sits down and asks for a drink. The bartender turns to him and says, "hey, why the long face?" ou:
An Irishman had been drinking at a pub all night. The bartender finally said that the bar was closing. So the Irishman stood up to leave and fell flat on his face. He tried to stand one more time; same result. He figured he'll crawl outside and get some fresh air and maybe that will sober him up. Once outside he stood up and fell flat on his face. So he decided to crawl the 4 blocks to his home. When he arrived at the door he stood up and again fell flat on his face. He crawled through the door and into his bedroom. When he reached his bed he tried one more time to stand up. This time he managed to pull himself upright, but he quickly fell right into bed and was sound asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow. He was awakened the next morning to his wife standing over him, shouting, "So, you've been out drinking again!" "What makes you say that?" he asked, putting on an innocent look. "The pub called -- you left your wheelchair there again."
I just deleted a post I wanted you to know that nobody will post any jokes like it again (you know which one if you posted it) Dont do it again. ALL THESE JOKES so far were clean and went well under the rules of this board. If you are not familiar with the rules I will repost them. :af:
A recent survey was conducted to discover why men get out of bed in the middle of the night: 5% said it was to get a glass of water 12% said it was to go to the toilet 83% said it was to go home (Q) What' s the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo? (A) A southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage along with a recipe. (Q) What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale? (A) A northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time". A southern fairytale begins "Y'all ain't gonna believe this stuff. Sorry, I got carried away.
