Post your best bullcrap story you've ever heard here...

LOL God knows what Brandy would do....:grin:

 

what's a petticoat?
Do they make buicks go fast? LOL:Brow:

 

No ,:3gears: but I bet they make a great drag chute for some of the faster cars

 

where's waterboxguy at? i know you know some stories. how bout the one about our friend that bought the monte carlo for about $1000 that has the suped-up mouse? you know the one that pulled the front wheels off the ground with street tires, 2.88 open differential, and possible 2 barrel carb? i'm talking about the one that couldnt be driven when the roads were moist because it packed so much power. the one that would put the regal to shame, the one that hasnt left the driveway, the one that will never see the dragstrip.

wait, how about the jackass who couldnt read a time slip and started a rumor that his stock 350 sbc took my 455 in the quarter by around two seconds?

1. how the hell do you not remember losing to a car that beat you by around two seconds? not exactly what i call a photo-finish. the dude couldnt have made more than 3 passes on the day at most anyways. not hard to recall. i want what he's smoking

2. if you ever have trouble reading a time slip, and you cant remember winning or losing heads up matches; here's a clue: look closely and you'll notice something each of your timeslips have in common - YOUR F@#%*!$ CAR NUMBER!!!!!!!!!! these numbers will be found directly above the lane you drove in and.......(drum roll).....right with your stats!:TU:

 

My buddy is the king of BS. He said that my truck had a "big-block" V8 in it because I had a severe case of Axlewrap, due in part to 4.10 gears and rounded off leaf hangers. I had a habit of mashing the gas on that poor little 302 all the time, so everyone saw my 33s chirp and the axle try to twist off the shocks. It wasn't until I showed him that the mustang my buddy owned (bone stock) had the same engine until he ran out of excuses to not line up his Jeep beside me at the airport. (Our local "Drag strip" :3gears

The best of all, though, was when my bone stock Z24 cavalier whooped a V6 mustang, which the owner bragged had a "Stage 3 shift kit, Cold air Ram intake, and custom dual exaust" from a rolling start.

:beer Long live BS Stories.

 

Im here im here!! I know all about that yellow monster that wouldnt even race my N/A V6 :laugh: After workin the track for 4 seasons I know and seen first hand alot of BS. But the funniest thing I watched happen at the track was this kid that couldnt be more than 18 was in his daddys new trans am. Well he pulls up to the water and stops at the drain and waves for more water....I chuckle and gave him what he wanted. So this yutz pulls about 10 feet past the water about where we start gluing the track and he starts his "burnout" but the only problem is that his tires arent spinning. So after about a minute and a half of laughing and throwing out the rock on hand thingy smoke is ROLLING out from the bottom of his car rather than out the rear. And so I do the good thing and keep cheering him on laughing my ass off finally after he got everyones attention he tries pulling up to the line but the car was stuck in place being that he roasted the shat out of the clutch/tranny. Needless to say he wasnt smiling much after that and id imagine neither was his parents.

Then you have your typical.....I could be 2 seconds faster if I would power shift....or If I had a purge kit Id beat you.....or your tires are bigger....or your cubic inches is 3X mine.....or I missed a shift....or your track is shat because I spun after dumping my clutch at 4k rpms on fwd. Or best yet I had you beat at the 1/8 mile (in a 1/4 mile bracket race).

A non bs story would be when we had a nice chevelle dump the bottom end out on the ground at the 1000ft mark and I found 4 pieces of camshaft somehow??? There was nothing left of the internals it was dumped everywhere....made nice souveniers for the kids in the crowd. FYR Camshaft pieces are very very hot after a 1000ft run I know because I picked it up and it hurt.:TU:

 

Those tales are just too funny!!! :laugh: :laugh:

 

I have this buddy that has an 06 SSR, bone stock. Tells us that it will beat the GSX, GN and the Z28, all are low 13, high 12 cars (actual times) Big arguement today is that the SSR only weighs 4025 pounds (actual 4700) Can hardly wait for the first day at the track this summer

 

Yeah I had an 87 S-10 Blazer that had a similar problem. it was a 5 speed, and badly rotted. the shocks were trash all the way around, and leaf springs were wasted in the rear. somehow, it sat level though. If i dumped the clutch and power shifted into second, the right rear tire would completly unload like it was on ice. I could smoke that tire for ever. it was weird, I figured the spring was so bad it would twist the axle and unload the tire. I could get the front tires about 6 inches off the ground with that one too. Just had to bounce it. broke the front body mounts doing that, it was incredibly rotted too. thats the same truck I drove for two weeks with no slave cylinder. That actually rotted too. I could jam the shifter in first if the truck was in low range and it would start to move. I would shift through 4th gear, then shift into neutral, then jam the transfer case back into high(made some god awful noises) and shift into second. kind of a pain, but it was fun. not bad for 250 bucks.. I miss that pile..

 

I can't unload my rear tires, last time I tried to completely grenaded my 9" rear end's pinion housing. Carnage!

I love cheap trucks. I had a Bronco II that we ended up rolling twice after pulling a wheelie on a hillclimb, but could never kill it trying to follow my bronco through the mud.

 

That is one nasty failure. I've attached a picture of my Blazer, Which I always refered to as my Ferrari S10X, 3 window coupe, ram-air. You can just barely make out the GS style scoops I cut in the hood. It was a three window coupe since some kind person in the city smashed the passenger window in febuary, but I drove it until may with nothing, not even a bag. It would snow in there and blow around as I drove, but I didn't care. It was a lovely atmosphere in there, like a snow globe... That truck was straight as an arrow when I bought it, no dents or dings only massive rot. I changed that fast. The gas door was even rotted. how does that happen? God I miss that truck more than I should. I bent both front rims doing donuts, It was airborne alot, and power shifted, with no mercy at all times.

 

Cheap/beaters are too damn fun. because you don't give a crap what breaks, and you treat it as such.

I need to find a nodular houseing for that 9" though. I thought they were supposted to be strong or' somethin'. lol

 

Sorry for going off topic. But are the positrack diffs just as strong as the ford 9 inch, or stronger? Are the ford 9 inch even that strong? Everyone in Australia reckon they're it and a bit (but then again the 350 chev is a popular choice of motor too). You look at all the cars in Street Machine magazine and heaps of people use them. Even the people with really quick holdens use the 9 inch but I reckon they should be getting a diff at least from another gm car.

 

a 9" rear end is combarable in strength to a Dana 70 axle, except for the stock third member housing.

however, there are a couple housings out there that have a large "N" stamped on them outside, which have an extra rib for support and are much stronger.

A comparible GM axle, I believe, is the "12-bolt" rear, though I'm not completely sure. uzzled:

 

even the corparate gm 10bolt 8 1/2 will take the abuse with the right parts
i am running one with a girdle/spool/bigbearing axles/good gears and
it can handle 10 second passes

 

What the deuce is a Dana 70 axle?

 

a dana 70 is a truck axle mostly, found in f450 ford trucks ans some f350
/E350 truck/vansvery large houseing ,im sure its in dodge trucks also
the dana 60 is very strong and found in some old mopar cars

 

A buddy of mine sold a used cam to a guy that had a 5.0 Mustang that ran 13's in the 1/4 .The guy is nice but not real bright.My buddy saw him a while after that and asked him how he liked it .He was grinning from ear to ear said it was the best change he ever made.His car now runs in the 9's .My buddy asked him where he ran and the guy told him .My buddy said I hate to break it to you but thats a 1/8 mile track. Not a BS story but a good one.ou:

 

on my last break,some lady told me her sunbird was rare because it was the last one made with a frame.ou:

 

My favorite is where people add up their additional bolt-on horsepower because is said on the product "adds up to 15 hp, 20 hp, etc." A friend of mine installed headers, a flowmaster, a K&N air filter, and something else (probably a chrome dress up kit) and he's adding up all the potential horsepower gains. He's like " I just added like 90 extra horsepower to my car" and blah blah blah. Mind you, none of these people are remotely mechanical in nature. If owning tools makes people mechanics, Then I'm a doctor, because I've applied more than my share of bandages.

Keep 'em coming. I love hearing about morons with "Bad ass bolt-ons."
-Josh